A New Life - A Whirlwind Of Six Weeks I Still Can’t Quite Believe - Part One

It’s been almost two months since I last blogged, and for a very good reason. My call came, my first ever call and I was given a second chance and the gift of life by my hero donor and their family.

I was feeling extremely poorly last time I posted and rested for a while. I was then planning to write and tell you what happened at clinic in Harefield when I attended on July 25^th…. But literally the following day I was called and back up in London waiting for news about my life saving operation.

I still can’t comprehend what has happened to me, I also can’t believe how far I’ve come in such short space of time. I don’t want to bore you with pages and pages of my drowning on so will write a few posts if I can explaining what happened, how I felt, how I feel now, and add some pictures we have taken over the last few weeks to show exactly how my journey has panned out…. Please bear with me as I’m still trying to get my head around it myself!!

I was seen at Harefield in clinic on 25^th July, I had all my tests done and then saw my consultant in the afternoon - things were getting pretty desperate now and he said that he would have another word with the team and try to get things prioritised. Stefan and I left the hospital for our long journey back not thinking very much of this at all, just to continue with living life the best way we know how and just hoping one day I would get that call. I had been listed for exactly six months that week and I was amazed at how quickly the time had past…. We finally got home late evening, had something for tea and I updated facebook on the news of the day and we went to bed for some well needed rest.

We were both in a deep sleep when the sound of my mobile ringing literally made me jump out of my skin, through coughing up my lungs and answering I soon realised I was talking to a transplant co-originator from Harefield who calmly apologised for ringing so early in the morning and telling me that a pair of lungs had become available if I would like to come up and see if they were a match…. It was 5.15am, I was shaking like a leaf and couldn’t believe what I had just heard, but through the coughing and the shaking I was able to say yes, yes of course…. She told me to get a bag together and leave within the next hour. I was an utter mess, Stefan thought it was a prank at first but when I assured him it wasn’t he was an auto pilot packing all my things whether I needed them or not! We climbed into the car and set off on our way, I was sobbing, shaking, in total shock I just couldn’t believe that literally 24 hours from travelling up to Harefield for a clinic appointment we were travelling up there again for possibly a life changing operation that I had been waiting for, for so long.

I made several phone calls on the way up, none of them proberly made sense as I’m sure I was blubbing throughout all of them. News soon got around and I was receiving lots of good luck messages which were very much appreciated but at the time I just felt like I was in a dream bubble, nothing was going in or out, I just couldn’t make sense of a thing.

We made good timing despite traffic and I was sat on the bed in my room by 11am, as I was there in clinic the day before, I had all my bloods, x rays etc done so no more tests were needed as they had all the results. Rob, the co-ordinator told Stefan to shower me and gown me up and we were literally waiting for the green or red light as to whether the lungs were a match or not. He said this would take about an hour, but within 20 minutes, he came back in, said “this is a lot quicker than I expected but can you take these please they want you down now” - I had no chance to call anyone, I took my first lot of immuneo medications and started to be wheeled down, squeezing my husbands hand and absolutely balling my eyes out. I’m crying now writing this, I cannot tell you the mix of emotions going through my head, I was petrified, I knew how badly I needed and wanted this life changing operation but at the same time I didn’t want to say goodbye to Stefan, I didn’t know if I would see his face again…. I will never forget that moment, that hug he gave me as we had to say goodbye for as long as I live.

Arrived at Harefield, 26th July am.  

Gowned up & waiting to hear if it's all go....

I remember looking at the clock as the surgical team were gathered around me, attaching tubes and starting to send me off to sleep, telling me they would look after me…. At 12.55pm, on Thursday 26^th July 2012 by eyes closed, and I wasn’t sure when or if they would open again.

I was none the wiser in my sleeping state, but I had soooo many messages of support from friends and family back home - even from some celebrities which was just amazing….

A Tweet From Smiler

My Swamp Brother Friend, Stephen :)

Stef Telling Everyone The Transplant Was A Success &

Fellow TXer/ Cfer Kirstie's Status From That Day

I cannot comprehend how my husband felt whilst I was in theatre. I guess you don’t know how strong you are and whether you would be able to go through something like that until you are physically put in the situation but I truly think my husband is amazing, he was completely on his own until his brother joined him later that night for company. My husband is only 23 and he has always been my rock, but he showed everyone that day just how incredible he is. He even took time to update friends back home on my progress, even though he was stressed and exhausted himself. I will never forget just how strong he pulled through for me, not just that day but through the weeks of my recovery when things were just as difficult as we couldn’t be together as much as we liked.

An Inbox Message From My Amazing

Husband, So Emotional - One Of The Most Testing Times Of Our Lifes

One That Will Never Be Taken For Granted Or Forgotten

I don’t remember very much at all when I was finally woken from sedation, Stefan told me bits and pieces, I was taken off the ventilator on the Friday night, Stefan had sat with me for a while and talked to me but I was still sedated and barely made any sense just stirred every now and then. My mum and sister came down that night too and stayed until I was awake and talking fully on Sunday morning. I know now, the total time of my operation was 7 hours and 55 minutes and I was weaned from bypass after 115 minutes. I’ve never liked ICU, the staff there take amazing good care of you, but the pain and hallucinations you get from the medications were unbearable. I was so uncomfortable with the drains and the wounds on my chest I just couldn’t sleep and would keep getting panic attacks that I couldn’t breathe. I could breathe, I had new lungs, I just didn’t realise yet. It was like a case of mind over matter I had to teach my brain all over again that things were ok, but it took along time. I had my first bronch awake on ICU that morning and looked at the screen at my new lungs and the bright blue stitches, it was an incredible sight, as I lay there with my mouth wide open and the camera down my throat into my left lung I could see how clear the lobes were, inflamed of course but they were bound to be! It was all so surreal….

Me In ICU After Being Taken Off The Ventilator

On the Sunday afternoon I asked if I could sit out of bed, I was really swollen and wanted to feel a bit of normality and have a nice drink, something other than water to quench my thirst. So with Stefan and the nurses help they moved all my drains and I was sat up straight and talking - it felt a hell of a lot better, in walked one of my CF nurses from Exeter just in time to catch me out of bed only 4 days post transplant, better still I was able to stand up myself, a little bit wobbly, but incredibly steady on my feet after what I had just undergone. The following day I asked to be moved from ICU to the transplant ward, and after having two of my four chest drains removed, I was transferred on the Monday 30th to E ward after lunch to start recovering…

Sunday, Day 4 After TX Sat Out Of Bed

Trying To Give You Guys A Smile... ;)

Thank you for reading, part two to follow soon. xxx